Monday, July 29, 2013

Encounters ~ Shudddup and get ya cup of tea !

It has been a long time since i blogged something of this genre, not that we don’t have topics to blog but it was due to the so called time factor and my new hobby ! encounter_ekaambaram The title as it reads “ Encounters” might have reminded you of some terrific Police stories like Kaakha Kaakha, Vettayaadu Vilayaadu and all, isnt it ? The picture to the left was added specifically to clarify the contents of this blog !  So you now know what this is about :)

Well ok, first things first, what do you think about the role that actor vadivelu played in this movie “MaruthaMalai” ?? It was totally hilarious and one of his career best roles, no doubts about that, but have you personally met such a policeman in your life ? I have met so many !!


If I was asked to sort these incidents chronologically, then I’d put this first. I was staying in an area named Pammal during those college days and the land lady lead her life with (dhool) Sorna akka  as her role model  (we can surely find sorna akka’s portrait in one of her bedrooms).  It was very tough those days to survive without a two wheeler and so I asked my mom to send my Kawasaki 280 cc (bajaj spirit) from Tuticorin.  Once that arrived through Vivegam bus services, I collected it at around 4 am and  left it at the front of the house. The same day I had to leave early to my college as well and so my bike was still there at the front. I parked the vehicle late that night within that compact parking space, assuming that the land lady was very well aware of it. The very next day again I had to start early as I had to pick up my dad from the Airport (using that bike) and then leave to college via bus. My beloved land lady never  cared about this when I informed her a week back, but now she some how found that vehicle parked in front of her house to be  suspicious. The very next day when I came back home, I saw a group of police force surrounding my house. I was indeed very happy, I told to myself “One day or the other we surely knew that this lady is going to get arrested for all the atrocity and that day has come !” But when i came a little closer, I found that they were inspecting my bike ! As soon as I entered the scene, the land lady came running in, she said, “Thambi, did you know ? that a terrorist has parked this vehicle in front of our house” .. I was like, WHAT??? !!, she continued before I could open my mouth, “and that suspect is supposedly roaming in our area”.. This time I was really mad, “ this is my bike, and when i came to tell you about this, you never listened to what I said but instead you were meticulously explaining the metti oli scene to your sister” .. “and now you say I’m a terrorist” .. I turned towards the S.I., i told him, “Sir, this bike belongs to me, and these are the documents (RC papers / Insurance). He looked at me as if I stole that bike, i explained him the out of sync situation between me and the land lady which resulted in this hi-fi investigation. He was not interested in any of that, “I am going to arrest you and file a FIR, so that you get expelled from your college” . WTF, i was totally confused and frustrated, I asked him the reason, instead he questioned me back, “WHERE IS YOUR LICENSE??” .. I told him that it is yet to arrive in a courier, and which was why I had not taken it out. He said, “ I don’t know that and all, if you have this bike, you will drive ‘ONE DAY’ without the license and you might kill somebody, so I’m arresting you for that offense” . (Oru manasaaatchiyae illaatha police innaiku than da paarkuraen) I had a mild doubt that if he had any pre-cogsmarudhamalai predicting crimes in his department. The land lady from behind gestured me to bribe him, I took my wallet and counted all that I had. 74 rupees !!  I gave 70 rupees to him, he looked back, made a head count I guess and said, “so many have contributed (Iraq nithikaagava da collect panreeenga), give us 100 rupees” .. I told him that I am a student from so and so college, and that is all I have got. He got that remaining 4 rupees change I had, and he said that he’ll come back again to check my license. I guess I would have been the first person to pay fine for the bike parked in a garage and special thanks to that landlady  !! I thought it was those policemen’s duty to check these details until he grabbed my 4 rupees :)


The second story involves my friend Romelus fernando, who was caught in a traffic signal for a traffic violation that was created minutes back. (Guess they carry all the sign boards in their hands, and plant them wherever they want to) This is a real incident (that happened 3-4 years from now), and we were the people involved in this.  He had no other choice, but to bribe him and leave immediately for his meeting at office. He had a slight doubt, what if we get caught in the next signal ?? we don’t even have a receipt to show !!  He was not afraid to ask that because he had already paid the bribe #likeaboss, for which the constable replied a cyptic word “Kuruvi” (sparrow) in his ears. And as he expected, he was charged with another rule violation IPCxy1az in the next signal, he immediately uttered the word “Kuruvi”. To his surprise the constable let him go almost immediately. As soon as he came back, he told all his friends about the new key word communication that our Tamil Nadu traffic polices were using. A week after that, he was again caught near valluvar koattam signal for speeding. Tada !!! he got reminded of the keyword, and told the constable, “Kuruvi”. The constable instead of letting him go, came near, patted him slowly on his back, and said, “Thambi, it’s Kaakka (crow) today, better pay the fine and leave” . I was thinking, if they use all this intelligence against the criminals, Tamil Nadu would have been the most safest place to live :)  (relatively it is safe, but just saying) (this was also posted in fb, few years back)

Enaku 30, unaku 20 :

Ok, the last incident occurred at Chromepet while we were getting back for our breakfast at Ganesh Mess. My friend Kumar was caught by the police for over speeding in that MIT bridge, and he was threatened as usual with a charge sheet, fine = Rs. 500. It wasnt the first time for us, and so we knew what to do, he went near the constable and told him that we had only 50 rupees in our hand (no change). The constable got it and permitted us to leave by handing over the bike key. While driving back to the hotel for breakfast, we found that we were running short of another 20 rupees. After thinking for a while, we decided on something, we drove back to that same police, “Sir, that money which you got was all that we had for breakfast, it’s ok, you can keep 25 with you and please give us our 25”.  He replied back, “thambi, here keep this 30 rupees with you, have your breakfast and i’ll take that 20” . Remember the fine amount 500 rupees ? but still I like that last bit of humanity left in him !marudhamalai_2

Nobody is happy about bribing, and Yea, I know bribing is against the law and an unethical act, but this has been like this for a long time. Probably, an ‘Indian thaatha’ should come to save us all !  For students like me, who were totally unaware of the knack, when caught for all these reasons get totally lost. Out of that fear and to save our precious time that trickles down by arguing, we finally give out that hard earned money and leave that filthy place as soon as possible. I can tell you a reputed fact, in other places they bribe in order to stop them from doing their duty but only here we pay them to do their duty. Shame on us..


  1. Machi.. Terrorist is ultimate da!! I was literally lolling!!!

    1. That land lady's name was baai amma, you should have seen her !!!

  2. Siripu police.. First incident is very funny. Send one I had come across in FB too. Third police is very sentimental.

    1. :D there were so many incidents, i just picked 3 to keep this short !