Dr. MBBS

“Welcome Welcome !! ” he invited me and my brother as we entered into the hospital, for a minute we got confused that If we entered the wrong building, I mean that wedding hall near by instead of a hospital. I turned back and confirmed it with the big red cross hanging above. The man who invited us was in his mid thirties and he was wearing a shirt that looked  like it was worn for three straight days. His reactions were similar to the one who has just seen some food after a going through a terrible famine phase .  As he invited us, he went inside the doctor's room, and I thought may be this Doctor hasn’t paid his compounder for months and which was why all this welcoming and all. But, it was an absolute shocker when I saw the same guy with the steth around his neck, and a Close up ad smile, sitting in the doctor' chair. "How may I help you ?", he asked us, sounding exactly similar to those enquiry booth policemen in a railway station. I immediately started searching for the degree board hung some where, and Or you could say, I was waiting for one of his nurses to come running in, with a newspaper in her hand, "Doctor !! Doctor !! congratulations ..you have successfully cleared your +2 board exams" kinda.. Deserted hospital and this hospitable Doctor did make one thing clear, that we made a big mistake !! And yea, this post is going to brief such kind of weird encounters that I had with such doctors..
Once I met with an bike accident ( that was the second one :P ) and this time it was because of a dog that jumped in from no where. Disc breaks - bike skidded - dog escaped and the next moment, I was in rain waters. With that half available consciousness I saw a scooty pep passing by, thought she stopped by to help me, but then she pulled out her phone and started fighting with her boyfriend ( I said to myself "nalla varuvama, nalla varuva") . As soon as I got up, I couldn’t breath and I knew I screwed some of those spare parts within. Went to that above mentioned doctor, and with no relevance to that injury, he was keen in measuring my blood pressure. I told him, Doctor I seem to have trouble with breathing, kindly do something about it. After taking a Chest X-ray he said, there were no fractures and this is just a muscle cramp. He prescribed some gels and pain killers, which he asked me to take for a week. After 2 weeks, I couldn’t even get up from my bed, from bad it became worse. I went back to him with all those agony, and he asked me "Enna pa thambi marupadiyum vilunthutiya :D ??" ( hey, what happened to you, did you fall down again :D ? ) .. This time I was totally pissed, I told him that his medicines never did solve any of my problems (that was totally expected I know but still) and the pain was very severe. He said "We should better take a scan !" , and I was like "And now we're talking".. He referred me to a specific Scan center, and for that referral document, I'm sure he would have been paid ( alibaba and the 40 thieves you remember). As soon as the lab technician came out with the results, he asked me "How did you come here ?" I told him, I came in my bike and that is parked outside ( from his gestures, a mild doubt popped up, that the scan amount exceeded the expected amount and for security purposes he is asking for my bike ). He replied, "Son, better take an auto from here", and he showed me the x-ray report that came along with the scan. It had 3 rib bone fractures, just like someone had drawn a straight line with a ruler in those last three bones. He said, "You better consult a cardio-thoracic specialist from now on", and I understood it like this, "you better go to a doctor who has really completed his MBBS".. While driving back, I was thinking about the X-ray report he gave me initially (the first one), if there were no fractures observed in that report then whose REPORT was it then ??

This wasn't the first time actually, I had a similar incident during my final semester. Sakthi Venkateshan's out swinger managed to get a thick edge, and I being the wicket keeper took it at the cost of injuring my little finger. I went to an ortho specialist in Chromepet, he took a look at my finger and he asked me to undergo some radio waves coupled with electric current in the combination of ugly nurse treatment. I told him that the injury seems to have resulted in a fracture, since I was not able to move it at all. But he was so sure that it was a tendon/ligament/muscular issue, and he asked me to take that IR massage bla blah for one week. So everyday, I used to come there for that electric treatment, my friends thought I was going there because the nurses were looking too good, but no !! They usually connect these two nodes on two ends of that little finger, after which they pass few milli amps. One fine day the new person who attended me screwed the milli amps knob unknowingly and several milli amps passed through my body, my room mate was busy making a video clip of me and that mAh reading. At least after that incident I should have realized about this hospital, but my bad I didn't. A week after that, I went to him and I told him that it didn’t get better, it was when he asked me to take a x-ray (same referral technique). I don’t think we need a specialist to read that x-ray, it was clearly broken. The most hilarious thing was his reaction when he had a look at that x-ray report, he exclaimed "Oh boy, you've a got fracture !! :O ", as if he has come out of a delivery room with a baby boy in his hand, and I was like, "then what the heck have I been telling you for the last one week !!".. Such a huge hospital with so many specialist doctors visiting it, and the treatment is like this.

I don't know how I get referred to such kind of doctors, but thinking of such encounters sends shudders down my spine. Be very careful when you decide to go to a doctor. Try to Google all the medicines referred with their pharma names, Enquire about him / her to more than one person who had already consulted him / her.